Out of the Box – Unexpectedly – #1

August 23, 2012 (San Diego)                 

             How often have I read: think or be “out of the box?”

            I had two experiences were the box I had my mind in was unknown to me until the fragile box was shattered by life. Scary but good for me

            I was in a learning session on the topic of optimal motivation. The program was promoting that motivation for the most part is a skill which I get to develop. I am not totally at the mercy of circumstance.

            As I was reflecting on my sometimes aggressive behavior, (not optimal motivation) aggressive is most likely the correct word, not assertive. I was asking myself what drives the aggression. POP! My thoughts went back to kindergarten. (Believe me that was a demonstration that my long term memory on certain emotional events was working just nicely.) In kindergarten I was often bullied by another classmate. (I have no idea of the metric of “often”. It may have only been twice in the entire year, but recollection was that the bullying was more routine than that.)

Anyway, back to the story  My mind immediately put 2 and 2 together I was being aggressive as a defensive measure to not let the outside push me around.

Down came the box of defensiveness. Well it did not totally come down but it is diminishing.

Wow, what an experience for the mind to flash back and let me know why it is doing what it is doing for better or for worse. Now I have the opportunity to do something to restore that aspect of me toward normalcy.

We will see how that works.

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